Nothings going to stop the Mensa-Houdini Dog Child from breaking into the freezer - so freezer relocated to Spench.(1) The latest heist - the doglets injested a bag of frozen chips, 2 Linda McCartney pastry thingys, a bag of peas, a bag of sweetcorn, 7 stuffed bones, 2 pizza bases, but curiously the broad beans were opened and ignored. The poo run today has been........often...... and sweetcorny.
But suspicion has fallen on Java. JAVA! See, these freezer heists never happen when its Abe, Kato and Lindsay around. Only happens when its Java, Kato and Lindsay. But Java, though foody, has never been destructive, not one for bin raiding or cupboard opening or taking things if it involves more effort than putting your snooter in a bowl.
(1) Spench - North Welsh, room that has no discernable use, usually too far from kitchen to be pantry, not enough natural light or size to be a useful room. Often contains coal, bicycles and pickaxe. However, large enough for drunken second cousins to stay over on foldy out bed.