kato age two

(no subject)

We have some new windows which were an absolute bastard to put in as the house is quirky and confuses spirit levels. It may look straight but it aint. It may be straight according to many spirit levels but to the human eye it looks bizarre. We barked endlessly in shifts at the builders. But only because we knew they were scared of us. We were indifferent, even a little flirtatious, to Aga Man and Wrought Iron Blokes, who thought we were sweet and felt sorry for us having to lie on sofas, watch Bright Ideas TV/Under the Hammer and be given endless distractional treats/filled bones to distract us from the intrusion.

Because this week we have been mainly confined to the front rooms/bedrooms due to the Aga being fitted. Going to the karzee was done on leads as Wrought Iron Blokes also in. They should have finished the railings in  September, and just realised they have more chance of getting paid if they finish the job. Like Duh! even us doglets get the command/reward/time calculation.

Aga not yet functional as it went dark before the flue could go up. They should finish it tomorrow. But hot food/cooking might not happen till Tuesday. S'OK - we doglets like our walks to the takeaways. We have been promised Home Made Biscuits made in Aga, as recompense. Bet they're veggie though :-(

Humans painted the ceiling over the Aga this evening, as kitchen project starts on wednesday and humans didn't want to be turning Aga off so soon, or trying to paint over the new kitchen. Aga takes 24 hours to heat back up. More ceiling painting tomorrow.

We say "kitchen project" as having kitchen fitted would sound far too simplistic for the immense project this is going to be. Remember this was a delipidated old house which has been neglected, badly treated and bodged. Even the surveyor used strong terms such as "butchered" "filthy" "ancient" and "ruined".  Current "kitchen" is a a cheap botched affair, the cooker is concreted in, numerous holes/chasms in the plaster, filthy shattered marley tiles, ruined fireplace, gas pipes extended amateurly and the hot water travels for several minutes before reaching the kitchen, even though the new boiler is less than 3 metres away. Heating Man didn't pick this up when he connected new boiler, too distracted trying to stop the cellar flooding.

Thirty square metres of floor tiles weighs Many, Many Trillions of Abes(1). The Collective were impressed, all sitting on the new windowsill, as the humans valiently struggled them indoors.

(1) An Abe is the Collectives weight measure but has become skewed by the small ones recent extreme weightloss. Never mind the Abekins diet, being "prey" gets those kilo's off! An Abe is about a medium bag of pick 'n mix/cone of chips

ahhhh you have an Aga - I'm so jealous, they always seem so excellent!! (but if I had one, I'd actually have no room for anything else in my kitchen!)
Its our one rash indulgence while doing up the Wreck. They are not as big as people think they are apparently, unless you have the extra "module" which is a regular gas cooker and hob.
Do you need anything smashed with hammers? I can smash things with hammers if you like. I'm not stressed or owt, it'd just be fun!

Seriously it sounds like that first home-cooked meal is on it's way.

As for the Abe, it's a sort of inflation (i.e. a thing might have once weighed 10 Abes, but now it's 12!).
We had baked potato but it took ages as the thing isn't heated up properly yet (takes 24 hours). Is strange - it just being on all the time. Looby has already identified it may be good to sleep in front of.

Not really smashing anything at the moment. We are paying the kitchen peeps to get the Marleys off the floor. If your at a loose end - come over and see the Critter & doglets this weekend.