kato age two

kAt0 is Innocent Innit

One of us is “In disgrace” due to a splatty poo on kitchen floor. Carob Creams are now banned until one of us owns up. Main suspect is I and I, da Pretty Sweetness kAt0 – (or Pooey Shiteness Krappo as Java and Abe are now referring to me. Pair of Cats!). If it were in the Tate it would be Art, mused Java, which resulted in a withering glare from human who was mopping and cursing “What you done? Glued it on?”
Humans upset was further compounded by the mystery plopper  managing to get it on the one tiny mat, missing the extensive, easy-to-clean tiled area. I mistook the irritated scritching of the mop as an invitation to play and tried to grab the mop, diving on the mop knocking human to one side.  I followed with a well tantalising Play Bow. Human was in no mood and hissed at me.
Human so distressed at this monolithic lapse in  housetrainedness – our bottoms were inspected for tell-tail splatty skidders. To add final insult to injury, Abe accidentally let out a windy when being inspected for debris and klinkers, – human said strewth and staggered back, burning her elbow on our Aga. (No fur see, always a hazard)
Abe snickered –  we were sent Outside to think about it.
I and I, kAt0 bootylicious is put in the frame for most pranks and sins innit. But the humans never put themselves in the frame eh? Where was hippy between 2 and 5? (nursery?)
I was woken to the lovely sound of a wretching dog in the early hours of Wednesday morning....its just autopilot now.... out of bed, down the stairs, dog out.... 5 minutes...dog in, back to bed...well they will insist on eating grass...